Hipsters Can't Help Themselves.

Even the most benign articles can carry evidence of infuriating hipster-dom; take for example an article in today's New York Times about McCarren Park in Williamsburg. The mention of Williamsburg in the title made me think that there must be some evidence of hipster behavior to arouse and justify my disdain for their culture.

"...Back then, the track was cinder, and when I ran on it..."
nothing yet..

"...With the gentrification of the past two decades came more attention..."
Gentrification, getting warmer..

"...Other local attractions include the pool parties — free concerts held in an emptied community pool featuring indie rock bands..."
Indie rock bands = hipster, but pool parties? = a little warmer...

"...It’s possible to watch simultaneous games of hipster kickball and Hasidic baseball..."
There we go! Kickball! They just couldn't resist!! A sport normally played by 8 - 12 year olds. Of course they would adopt it!

With my anger level towards the artsy people in the city sufficiently elevated, I moved on to the rest of the paper.

Short Some XLF Puts

A few days ago I went short some September XLF (financial services etf) puts. Though I am losing money on the trade, I like it now more than ever given the selloff on Monday. I am currently short the September 20 and 21 puts with no hedge. Unless they expire worthless, I plan on rolling them out (and possibly down) to October on expiration.

One reason I like trading puts this way is that now, for example, I could buy the 20's back at $0.93 and sell out the October 19's at $0.98. Not much of a credit, but I could lower my strike price by 5% if I wanted to. I plan on waiting until expiration because I will probably be able to do it for more of a credit, or the puts will be expiring worthless. The only risk is that XLF will tank and there will not be any premium in the puts. That is a significant risk, but it is already trading 44% off it's high of $36 from October.

Stop the Press. Daddy Yankee Endorses John Mccain

Like any good republican, McCain will take votes wherever he can get them. Unfortunately, Daddy Yankee has no vote because Puerto Rico is a territory and not a state. Daddy Yankee points out, "he has been a fighter for the Hispanic community, and I know that for me personally, I chose him as the best candidate because he has been a fighter for the immigration issue." Oh how McCain has fought for the immigration issue.

The most awkward moment however was when McCain spoke. “I know why you are sitting here,” McCain said in his speech, according to a press release from his campaign, “and that is not to listen to me so much, but I brought a special friend along with me today, a great American success story. As you know, he’s from Puerto Rico. He’s been married for 15 years. He has children aged 14, 12 and 10. One of his most famous songs, I know you’re very familiar with, ‘Gasolina.’ Well, here he is, Daddy Yankee.”

Would somebody please tell John McCain what that song is about? Hint: it is not about energy policy.

Homeless

There are few things more elitist and white than basing your understanding of the homeless off of an NPR program. The other day NPR had a fascinating piece on homeless people in New York as told by a formerly homeless alcoholic. The thesis was that homeless people were not homeless because of a lack of available jobs in the city, but mostly because they battled some sort of addiction or psychological disorder. 'The system' had not failed them in the way that people might suspect but had failed them nonetheless. The narrator went on to point out that food, clothing, and, to some degree, decent shelter were available for anyone who was homeless in New York. The narrator expanded on this point and said that anybody asking for money for food was being disingenuous (as many have long suspected); churches, shelters, soup kitchens etc. provide meals for anybody that walks through their doors.

I decided to put this idea of a homeless man not actually wanting food to the test in the Lower East Side a few nights ago. As I walked out of a pizza place with a fresh slice in hand, a homeless man approached me.

Homeless Man: Sir, sir, could you please help me, I am hungry and I am trying to get some money to buy some food.

Me: Here, if you are hungry, take this slice of pizza.

HM: No, that's OK.

Me: No, if you are hungry, take this slice of pizza.

HM: No that's for you. I just need some money to buy my own food.

Me: That's what I am saying, this can be your own food. Take this slice, and I'll get another.

HM: Fuck you.

Women's Bathroom

While on the subject of bathrooms:

I was recently promoted to the role of fire warden for my office. It is a prestigious position, and serving under me I have a deputy fire warden, a bathroom searcher for the men's room, and a bathroom searcher for the women's room. There are four men and one women in the office.

We will also be having a fire drill next Tuesday. I wonder how the bathroom searchers will react when I tell them to perform their repective duties. No pun intended.

Urinal Placement

Nothing is worse than a urinal placed right next to the sink. When you are washing your hands, you have the discomfort of another man's genitals adjacent to the soap dispenser. Or, when you are trying to take a piss, you get splashed by somebody washing his hands. Worse still, there could be a pervert washing his hands next to you.

Normally I encounter the poor placement of these facilities in public bathrooms. However, the person who designed the bathroom in my office also placed the urinal next to the sink. I generally solve the problem by using the toilets for both #1 and #2 (there are 2 toilets and 1 urinal for 4 people in the office). Unfortunately some other people in the office do not feel that way, and I have had some uncomfortable times washing my hands.

Boats and Hoes